• Deborah Charles-Nelson

"Shake off the pressure and SOAR, baby!"

Updated: Jun 18, 2020

I've been journalling a lot recently, just to help me to relax and get all my thoughts out on paper, and it led to this blog post that I want to share with you today. It's all about silencing the noise from within and taking the pressure off so you can bloom. I hope this helps you, or please share it with someone who you think it will.

So, let's get in to it...

You'll agree; there's nothing like pursuing your passions without pressure, right?

There's something so beautiful about doing what you love without the deadline, without the fear of what someone would think, without our inner critic telling us "it's not good enough" or comparison (the thief of joy): "that's not the way everyone else does it?"

All these restrictions stunt our pursuits, and, for me it turned a lot of my passions into tasks.

Can anyone else relate?

But, I think I've figured out the solution, and it's this: Don't think too much.

Sounds pretty simple, but if you're anything like me, it'll take a lot of mind re-conditioning and creating new habits -- old habits really do die hard. But we have to start somewhere if we want any chance of a life free from pressure and comparison, right? So, recently I've had to go back to basics and ask myself three important questions like:

What do I enjoy doing?

What makes me happy?

What am I good at?

These questions are so basic, but you'll be surprised at how life has you so caught up in the rat-race that you forget what your fundamentals are. So, a quick exercise for you:

Ask yourself these 3 questions and quickly right down the first few things that come to mind. Remember to try your hardest not to overthink it and just go from there. That's what I'm doing now, and it's so freeing. Don't take it all too seriously, just have fun with it. After all, your passions are supposed to be enjoyable. It's funny how 'not thinking too much' shuts out comparison, kicks the inner critic out our minds and removes all worries about the deadlines, because it's done with intent and joy!

Do What Matters Most

I was reading a devotional the other week and it said (and I'm paraphrasing here): there's a difference between efficient and effective; efficiency is doing the same task over and over within the shortest time frame. However being effective is, and by Google's definition:



1. successful in producing a desired or intended result.


So, being effective has no marker of time as such, it's about being successful at getting what's important done, rather than getting the most done. And that is productivity. For me, this is key to staying sane whilst trying to juggle motherhood, working in healthcare during the pandemic, keeping my marriage thriving and pursuing my own creative passions like blogging! I have to choose being EFFECTIVE OVER EFFICIENT and QUALITY BEFORE QUANTITY.

Instead of checking off "learning a new language" or "organising my entire closet" on my daily 'to-do list', I've opted for "baking cupcakes with my son", "a movie night with my hubby" or creating a "fashion video" for my Instagram family!

Don't get me wrong, I'm all for a 'to-do list'. But it's vital for me that, even before I write my list, I assess what's really needed on that list. Whilst it may be tempting in this lockdown to create long lists of all the things we've ever wanted to do (ever!), assess each day whether it has a place on your list right now, and if you never get around to brushing up on learning that new language, that's okay. So, tying both points together, in order to re-ignite your passion sometimes you have to go back to the basics, but in order for you to continue to love what you do, you have to prioritise and choose effectiveness over efficiency.

So, let's talk about these lists...

Have you ever done lots of tasks in a day and still felt like you haven't really done much? I often feel this way when I've concentrated on getting a lot done and not what I was trying to get done.

This is a very long list, and I'd be lucky to get 2 things on that list done to be honest. But, if by some stroke of luck I managed to get all 5 tasks complete, I promise you at least one of them would lack the quality and attention to detail I take pride in when creating. And then I find myself feeling defeated or second-guessing everything I've done. When in fact, just the first two items on my list was enough for one day, and a task like editing a video could take a whole week. So, instead of a quick-tidy, I could have given the kitchen a good deep clean and be a bit more patient, or have a little fun whilst teaching my son, because I'm not thinking of the next task to complete on my list.

Okay, okay, I think I've said enough, but I hope this can free some of my fellow 'to-do listers' and over-thinkers! Remember: silence the noise from within, shake the pressure off and SOAR baby!

Love and Light,

Simply Deborah