Following on from my last blog post 'the fourth trimester' where I updated you on my recovery after birth, sleep schedules and how it's been balancing two children. I wanted to delve deeper into what's worked for us and also to encourage any mums planning a second child or anyone who's just interested, that along with the challenges there is so much joy in motherhood and we can most definitely do this!
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Mummy's Little Helper
It's easy for your older child to feel left out or a little jealous so I try and get Ethan involved and 100% transparency here, sometimes buying Ethan a new toy or picking him up his favourite snack after school does the trick.
Get them involved! Ask them to get the nappy, a blanket or to help sing them to sleep etc.
Plan ahead
Get clothes ready for nursery/school the following day and also the nappy bag- check it's all stocked up on nappies and wipes and spare clothes and sometimes I even leave the bag right by the front door so I don't forget it in the morning rush.
Take it in
Try your best to take in the moments when things are running smoothly, e.g. a smooth school run, both kids napping or just cuddles on the sofa.
Do what works for you!
If you're having one of those days where everyone seems to need you all at once. Just do what will save you time and energy- so for me that might be putting paw patrol on for an hour or occasionally making fish fingers and chips in the air fryer for dinner. Remember your kids don't need a perfect mum they need a happy one!
Divide and conquer on the parent front. Each of you try and focus on one of kids to get the day rolling.
But a very important part to note is to try and prioritise some down time just for you and your spouse- It can be something as small as eating together or watching a series together at the end of a long day. It's so important to still connect with your partner outside of the kids.
Something we are planning to do is outsource. Especially regarding cleaning- I've spoken to a few mums and this has helped immensely so if this is something your thinking to do too, let's go for it if you have the means to. E.g. getting a cleaner in every 2 weeks for a deep clean.
Give yourself grace, when the day hasn't gone to plan or you feel overwhelmed. Remember no-one is perfect and tomorrow is a new day. When the days and nights feel really long- remember it's just for a season and it will get easier.
Accept help when it's offered and ask for help when it's needed. As you go you will learn, you aren't in competition with anyone and this is your life so try your best to enjoy it for all that it is right now.
Love and Light,
Simply Deborah
xoxo